Life Roles.

Today - I'm talking life roles. I have this memory that stands out from a college anthropology class where we had to list all of the titles we assign our self. At the time they were things like: daughter, woman, friend, student, granddaughter, sister... etc. And some of the more important titles or roles at the time being the woman and the friend role. Ever since that class, ever so often I do a retest - and think about my current roles and the way the priorities have changed.

Motherhood does a number on our priorities, doesn't it?

My most important roles now - are mother, homemaker, worker... all the roles that keep me and my family afloat with our heads above water. Other roles have taken a back burner - granddaughter, friend, sister... even wife to name a few.

The question is: How do you maintain those 'back burner' roles so you don't loose them completely?

My grandmother is in a convalescent home with extremely bad Parkinson's Disease and we really don't see her enough. It's always something - my kids have runny noses, it's too close to nap time, I can't do it by myself... this list goes on. And she's not the only one.

I should call my sister and my friends more.

I should try and have more time with just the husband.

But when you are in the place of raising babies - what can you actually do?

It is the easiest to maintain friendships with those in the circles that your children are in. When they start school and extracurricular activities the parents of the children in those circles are the easiest friendships to maintain. Because they are already in the same places you have to be. No extra steps are required.

My advice on the other relationships? When someone pops into your head - make contact with them. If you have the time - call. If you just can manage a text - do that. Maybe you can write a quick email. But make contact - and make it personal (not social media!)

I've also started taking time to go over things I am thankful for with Lucille at bedtime. It helps us both recall our day - and think about the people in our lives.

What are your tricks for maintaining those life roles that are on the back burner right now?

I'd love to hear some advice.

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